Jottings

Did you know you can create a really beautiful ceremony to mark the move to a new home. This might involve family and close friends and include offering some sort of blessing in each room.




According to theologian Tom Driver rituals are primarily instruments designed to change a situation. They transform one state of being into another.
Funerals, Celebrations of Life, Committals, Home-Comings, Services of Remembrance
“In death the many become one. In life the one becomes many” Rabindranath Tagore

Honouring our loved ones

When someone we love dies, it is natural to want a funeral that reflects that person's life and honours their values and beliefs. But we may be very unsure about exactly how much freedom of choice we really have. A religious ceremony might include elements that do not feel appropriate to us and yet a humanist service may not allow for those elements we would very much like to include. We may have been left very detailed instructions or we may be simply following our heart.


Freedom of choice
It can be a great source of relief to discover that we need only include those things that feel meaningful and authentic.

We may decide that we feel comfortable with a service at the crematorium with chosen readings and music, family members speaking and a favourite prayer. Or we may prefer a private gathering in our own back garden with jazz played and poetry read followed by a small, private burial in our local churchyard. We might even want to stand in silence on the beach and scatter petals into the sea and have a committal at our chosen natural burial ground the following day.

It can be a considerable surprise to realise just how many choices we really have, and to discover the lack of regulation and restriction around funerals and burial.


Help and support

Once we understand the degree of choice we will want to bring together those elements that help us celebrate a life lived, and feel comforted and uplifted through the transition of death.

The services I offer include:

  • exploring with you the alternatives available
  • talking through any written or verbal instructions that have been left
  • talking about the religious or spiritual beliefs of the person
  • helping to find those things, be it music, readings, rituals that feel right and bringing them together into a ceremony
  • helping friends and family to offer their thoughts and contributions
  • help in writing a eulogy or creating something different, perhaps the sharing of memories, in it's place
  • help in deciding on any organizations you and your family and friends may wish to contribute to
  • conducting the ceremony on the day
  • listening and support


    • Please do contact me if you would like help at this time .



    I am also very happy to help anyone who may wish to prepare and plan for their own funeral. This can be a remarkable experience and can change our perspective on death and dying quite dramatically.

    Updated: 09/03/2011 2:42:35 PM